Life After A Failure

Many books, talk shows, or workshops are talking about how to be successful or how to build habits that will lead to a successful life. So far, I haven't seen anything about life after a failure. People prefer not to talk about embarrassing things. After lost count of how many failures I've made. I would like to share some helpful points to keep going on with your life.

1. Except yourself. Everybody fails. You are not the first person that fails and won't be the last either. A failure isn't the end of your life. Unless you decide to end your life by suicide.
2. Analyze. Note down every important point that contributes to your failure. Every failure is a lesson to gain in experience. Make a comparison to another person that has successfully achieved the same goal as you. Analyze every point that contributes to his/ her success. Learn it and use it for your next attempt. If you are sick of trying, you should skip this point.
3. Indulge yourself. Take a break from your daily life. Do whatever you like! Pursue your hobbies. If you don't have a specific hobby, do an activity that makes you happy. Make a beautiful memory of yourself. After some time, you'll say, "Been there, done that" to yourself. I won't explain it further. You know what it is.
4. Make a short term goal. A short term goal is a practical goal and effortless to achieve. For instance, saving $1 of your salary is effortless. After some time it will amount to something.
5. Write a book. I think I should publish a book about this topic after writing all those four points above. I could charge you some money for it but I share these points for free because I am generous.

I am a failure. I except myself and keep going on with my life. Take a moment to reflect your life. A failed attempt is worth a while of your effort. It directs you where to go. I hope you have the time of your life.

What Would You Say?

A woman recently wrote a heartbreaking confession in the counseling section of a magazine that I read.

She was raped shortly after being wed. The rapist was her sister-in-law's husband. Her husband was being treated at a hospital and her sister-in-law was at the hospital to visit him at that time. The woman told her sister-in-law about the incident. Her sister in law asked her forgiveness and begged her not to disclose this to their families and relatives. She was heartbroken because no one stood beside her. Not even her husband. Her husband and her sister in law prefer to save themselves from embarrassment.

Shortly after, the woman was pregnant and gave birth to a son. Her sister in law adopted the woman's son as an act to redeem her husband's bad deed. Two decades later, the son is aspiring to be a pastor and is studying at a seminary now. The woman's heart wound hasn't healed. She is longing for her son to recognize her as his biological mother. Up until now, her son knew her as his aunt. The rapist has grown old, weak, and sick. She has been distant with her husband since that incident.

In that article, she is asking how to tell her son about the truth and what would be the best way to tell her son.

If I was her counselor, I would suggest her to take the truth to the grave for her son's good sake. It's cruel but it would be the best. Any sane mother would love to be recognized by her own flesh and blood but telling the truth might make the son hate the origin of his existence. He might also think that God has destined him to be a pastor as a redemption of his biological father's deed. Not because of his pure love of God . Moreover his son has many years in his life to come but the woman has reached her old age. The truth might hurt her son for the rest of his life.

What would you say if you were the counselor of that article?

My Salary

I earned little salary when I started my career. It was only enough to eat. Fortunately, I stayed with my parents and rode dad's car to office.

I moved to Jakarta two years later. My salary was doubled but I wasn't financially independent. My salary was only enough to pay half the rent, food, and transportation. I couldn't save. I wanted higher salary.

I moved to other company two years later. My salary is doubled and I financially independent. I can save and I live a better life, but I want higher salary. I want to separate emergency money from saving and I want to allocate some money for investment.

Humans never get enough money.

I should grow some money from a tree.